You have your eyes wide open, too open, to the things that don’t matter — not really.
Like how they judged you about your new haircut or said, “How nice to see you!” in that half-smile kind of way and they didn’t even make eye contact. Or the time when you couldn’t wait to tell your good news, but the same enthusiasm wasn’t reflected.
These disappointments stick out like artificial flowers potted in real dirt, landscaped amid living grass and trees.
Long after the circumstances and the people who played a role are gone, you keep your eyes open and the hurt alive. Many, many breaths fan the pain of these open-eyed hurts.
Just close your eyes and see instead the legacy you can begin from the inside out.
Like squirrels burying acorns, you sometimes forget what you’ve accumulated until you look deeper. But it’s not the source of the hurt that matters. Not really.
It’s what you do with it when it comes up, over and over, until dissolved, or released, or stated loudly and to anyone who will or will not listen that You. Are. Done.
- You are done compromising your core for someone who doesn’t respect you.
- You are done reliving the nightmare of that night/day/month/year.
- You are done believing that you’re worthless.
The struggles and triumphs of your life are not measured by what you’ve become, but by who you are becoming. (tweet it)
And you are continuously becoming (thank goodness), especially when you close your eyes and sit quietly, doing nothing. Here, a new struggle appears, yet it is your most important one.
It’s like looking at a sunset until the first and brightest star emerges. I wish I may, I wish I might, have this wish I wish tonight. Slowly, your inner life illuminates with all manner of light until the need to open your eyes to the same hurt decreases.
Now, you understand why meditation is important.
Just close your eyes.
Close your eyes to
what you will become if you
Try it: Fire Log Pose, Agnistambhasana
Relax into resistance with Fire Log Pose. Closing the eyes and sitting in this posture immediately surfaces your inner world and helps release what you’ve been holding on to for far too long.
Heck of a pose when you’re in the thick of it, but (trust me) you’ll thank yourself when you’re done.
- Find a level seat for your sit bones, perhaps on the edge of a cushion or blanket, and place your feet flat on the floor, knees facing up.
- Slide your left leg under your right, laying the knee and ankle onto the ground. Use your hands and stack your right leg on top, with your right ankle on top of the left knee. Take care that the ankle is straight and not curved into the crease of the knee.
- If too intense, bring your left heel toward your pelvis. Otherwise, keep your legs stacked like logs one on top of the other.
- Bring your hands to the bottoms of your feet, or foot and knee, and flex the toes. Inhale, lifting from the abdomen. With a long spine, exhale and lean forward while rooting your sit bones down. Inhale and lengthen from the base of the spine, exhale and deepen the bend.
- Soften anything that does not need to be tense. Breathe deeply wherever you feel the most discomfort, and notice what the mind does when it meets resistance. Stay for six deep breaths before coming out of the pose and doing the other side.